just going to STAND there & watch me BURN (mark)

[lilliandoyle]

The night air whipped past her as she ran; the cold numbing her skin and freeing her from the pain she felt in her body. Tears ran down her eyes, blinding her briefly as she attempted to navigate her way through the forest. She had to get away. She had to get away from him – her father. Her breathing was coming out hard and fast as she gained altitude. It had only been twenty minutes since she had left the house, but it felt like an hour. Everything was moving so slowly for her, at least, in her mind. Her body and mind were running entirely on adrenaline; everything was instinct to her. All she had to look forward to now was her destination – the meadow. A couple years ago, Lillian had found a meadow that was a complete open space with flowers. Occasionally she would go there when she needed the sunlight, but now she needed to go there to hide. Unfortunately, the harsh heavy rain began before she could get there.

“Great. This is just great.” She said sarcastically, feeling her clothes getting soaked through. Hurriedly she ran to a nearby tree to take cover, ignoring the painful throbbing in her legs and arms. Her new blood coated cuts were washed away, leaving behind thin red lines. The bruises on her arms and the one on her eye wouldn’t fade away so easily. “God, what did I do to deserve this? Really?” The strength in her legs finally left her leading her to collapsing on the ground. It took all of her strength to curl up into a ball; the adrenaline rush that she had been feeling before was gone as she gave in to her sorrow. Sobbing, all Lillian could do was wish that something or someone would kill her so that her father could never hurt her again. “Please just kill me. Please!”

[MARK HARRIS]

~~~~~~~~~~

Mark was lounging around in his apartment above the auto shop. He kept fidgeting though. He had been lying on the couch watching TV but that soon go to be too boring, nothing good on. Wandering into the kitchen he took a quick look through the cabinets and fridge. Food wasn’t interesting him. Closing the fridge door he sighed and rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair. Giving up on finding something to do upstairs he padded softly down the stairs in just his jeans to the garage below. Setting about working on his bike for a bit he got frustrated with that too. Sighing he decided on the last thing he could think of to get rid of the stress he was feeling. Running. Locking the shop up on his way out he walked towards the forest, barefoot and only in his jeans. One of the good things about living above the auto shop was the fact that he had no neighbors to worry about.

Moving into the forest just a bit he found the hollowed out tree he liked and stripped off his jeans and boxers. He folded them up and tucked them into the tree. They would stay dry there if it rained and no critters found them. Standing naked in the forest he let out a breath before he let the change over take him. His temperature rose first and then his bones cracked and popped and moved under his skin. Finally his skin fell away in a slimy clear goop on the ground and he stood as a pure white wolf, with his same piercing blue eyes, a bit brighter in his wolf form though. Shaking himself he darted off into the woods. He ran, leaving all his thoughts behind and letting the wolf over take him.

He had been running for about a half hour before the rain started. The wolf huffed and lifted his head to the sky and howled. He didn’t mind the rain and breathing heavily he started running again. The rain had been falling for about five minutes when the wind shifted and the scent of blood hit Mark’s nose. His eyes lit up and he ran, following the scent, worried about someone being hurt. He slowed as he came near the meadow. He hadn’t yet reached it when he saw the reason for the blood. Slumped under a tree was a girl. Concerned but knowing if the girl was conscious she might be afraid of him he moved slowly closer to her. ‘Please just kill me. Please!’ The girl shouted and he whined a bit. He hated hearing people talk like that and he wondered what had happen to the girl. She looked beat to hell. The rain had washed the blood from her arms it seemed and left thin red trails on her arm. He wanted to lick her wounds, not for the blood that was there but because to him it was a how his species took care of wounds. But he knew he couldn’t, if he did he risked infecting her with the disease he had. For now he sat back on his haunches and watch her from under another tree. Keeping his distance from her, he would never attack her but he didn’t know what she would do in reaction to him. So all he could do was wait and see what she did. He wanted to lead her away from the trees and out of the rain to the small cave that he knew of, but she would have to trust him first. He was a wolf after all.

[lilliandoyle]

It was odd for her not to be her normal smiley self. When her father wasn’t around she could at least act like she was happy even when she wasn’t, but everything seemed to go to crap when her father came into town twice a month. All the scars and bruises that she got from her "hiking accidents" were from him for being an unholy girl. "I hear you've been hanging out with a boy." The images of her father entering her room made her hair stand on edge. "Several in fact." Lillian could remember turning around, but only to receive a fist in her face. Before she had time to recover, the familiar feeling of his hand slapping her across the face had thrown her to that smooth hardened surface of her bedroom floor. Her head still throbbed in pain from when he had grabbed her by the hair and pulled her up to his eye level. "You are just like your mother. A good for nothing whore." If she could recall, after those words he had tossed her against her desk and could faintly remember hearing glass breaking. Images of her little faerie figurines lying broken on the ground flashed through her mind and soon, new tears sprung anew.

Slowly Lillian pulled herself up to sit against the tree's trunk, wincing every so often when the rain would hit some of her new cuts. "God will judge you for your sins, daughter. He's always watching." Sometimes she thought that her father believed himself to be God. He was always watching her either when he was at home or through the eyes and ears of the town's gossipers. There was no way to escape him. "God, why must you test me this way? Can't you see that I am suffering because of your words running through my father's mind?" Lillian whispered to herself, running her cut up fingers through her soaking wet red hair. Looking up, she gazed out to see if the rain was letting up a bit.

That was when she saw it. Right across from the hiking path there was a white wolf sitting on its haunches underneath a tree. It was staring at her with piercing blue eyes that made her wonder if it was even real. Normal people would have been afraid, but she loved wolfs and most canine creatures. She had never had a bad experience with canine animals before, so why would she have one now. "Are you real?" She asked, more to herself than to the wolf. If this was happening, then she really wanted to know.

[MARK HARRIS]

~~~~~~~~~~

He whined as he heard the girl’s words whispered to the air. When she pulled her wet hair back from her face something clicked in his mind. He knew her. She worked at The Lodge. He’d seen her there often and they always made small talk as she was working. She loved hiking. He had asked her once about all the small scars and bruises she had. She had said they were from hiking. He could clearly see that they weren’t. She seemed to in love with hiking to cut herself up that much in doing so. But he had let it go, not pushing into her business. He worried about her but she was always smiling and she had never missed a day. He knew the moment she missed a day of work he would truly worry about.

Seeing her now he knew, her words told him what caused the painful marks on her. Her father. He growled slightly at the thought, wanting to rip the man apart for hurting an innocent girl for no reason. But he knew that he could do nothing to the man. It wouldn’t do the girl any good either. ‘Are you real?’ He watched her carefully. Sensing no fear from her he stood and walked over to her. He nudged her arm with his nose a few times and then moved away towards the path before looking back at her. He hoped she would understand that he wanted her to follow him. He made his way along the path for a few paces before he went off the path and led her to the opening of the cave. All the way to the cave he kept pausing and looking back to make sure she was following and close behind him.

When they reached the cave he went in and shook off away from her so as not to get her wetter than she was. Then he went over to her and sat back on his haunches looking up at her. His eyes seemed to be concerned. And he was, but he couldn’t talk to her and he only wanted to make sure she didn’t get sick or hurt worse than she had been.

[lilliandoyle]

Lillian stared down at her cuts and bruises, sighing to herself. It would be awfully hard to hide these for work tomorrow, but that’s why she had bought long sleeved shirts and jeans. Though, the bruise on her face might need some extra care. She would need an ice bag and cool washcloths to keep the swelling down. Tomorrow before she went to work she would have to put cover up over her bruises. That normally did the trick when this happened. The excuse that she had gotten all of these from hiking would not cut it unless she took precautions. If anyone found out about what her father did to her, then she knew that she would get the most crap back. Her father would find some way to make her suffer even if he was put in jail or something. “I wished he would just disappear.” Lillian whispered to herself; her focus slowly returning to the wolf in front of her.

How was she supposed to explain this to that guy who oftentimes asked about her cuts at the Lodge? A small smile formed on her face at the thought of him. He had been really nice to her and oftentimes, gave her a pretty decent tip. Sometimes it seemed like he genuinely cared about her, but she wasn’t entirely sure. In the meantime, though, now was not the time to dwell on these things. So deep she was in her thoughts, she hardly noticed the wolf moving towards her until she felt its cold moist nose nudging her arm. Lillian jumped a little but realized quickly that it wanted her to follow it. There was nothing else she could lose at this point. It took her awhile to get up because of the pain in her legs, but eventually she was able to follow behind the wolf slowly until they reached a cave. “I don’t recall there ever being a cave here.”

When they got inside, Lillian found a place that was far enough away that she wouldn’t get wet from the rain but close enough that she could still listen to it falling down from the sky. A chill went through her as her butt made contact with the cold cave floor, but she didn’t mind. Eventually she would dry off. “You’re lucky you have a nice fur coat to keep you warm. It must be nice during times like this.” She said, looking at the wolf and giving it a smile. “If you want, you can lay down next to me or something. I won’t bite.”

[MARK HARRIS]

~~~~~~~~~~

He watched her carefully as he lead her to the cave. He knew who she was. Lillian was her name and she knew his but at the moment she didn’t actually know it was him. He huffed at her comment about the cave. Not many knew about it and that was the way he liked it. The Lupanar, the packs place of power was close by to the cave. Many of the pack left their things here when they all met on the full moon. It was a safe haven and he hoped the girl wouldn’t share the caves place with too many people, if anyone at all. Watching her carefully she seemed to be deep in thought and he wondered what it was that had her so distracted.

He huffed at her again as she commented about his fur coat. It was warm and he would share it with her. Once she was settled he huffed at her again for her comment, if wolves could laugh that’s what it would have been. Moving over to her he curled himself around her and rested his head on his paws next to her thigh. He was only slightly larger than a regular wolf. He wasn’t as large as those boys from La Push, the shapeshifters but he was large enough to help keep the girl warm. His eyes flicked up to her face and he whined a little as they sat there waiting for the rain to stop. He wondered to himself if her father would come looking for her in the woods. He did Mark would not allow the man to touch her.

[lilliandoyle]

Gazing around her surroundings, Lillian couldn’t help thinking that this place would be a great place to go to when her father came back into town. She knew that she wouldn’t really be able to escape the abuse portion of his little return, but at least she could run and hide out here if need be. It was better than hiding out in the rain. Plus, it being Forks, it was definitely going to rain at least ninety five percent of the time. Another thought was that if she ever got caught in an unusually heavy rain during a hike, she could come here to wait it out until it stopped or got lighter. This place wasn’t something that she would share with anyone especially her father. Although, her father would never look for her so why even bother? She always came back. It wasn’t like she had a place to move into or the money to move into a place anyway.

“Why is life so complicated?” Lillian said, settling into a comfortable position before laying her head back to rest against the cave’s wall. Her eyes widened and her body tensed a little when the wolf curled himself around her. Was it trying to keep her warm? She relaxed slightly when the wolf got himself comfortable. “We are both lucky I guess. Father won’t come to find me.” She said slightly positively before reaching out timidly to touch the top of the wolf’s head. “Is it okay if I pet you?” Slowly Lillian moved her hand to the top of the wolf’s head until she made contact with the fur. It was really soft. “Father knows, though, that I have nowhere else to go. So why bother looking? I always come back because it’s the only place I have to live in.”Her grey blue eyes connected with the wolf's as she gave him a sad smile. "You are lucky. You get to be independent and free from those who have a hold over you in a way. It must be nice to be you."

[MARK HARRIS]

~~~~~~~~~~

The wolf stopped for a moment when he felt her tense. He didn’t want to scare her. When he lay down he felt her relax and felt better about it. His eyes watched her face carefully as she seemed lost in thought. Mark wished he could talk to her but that would destroy any chance of him finding a way to help her. ‘We are both lucky I guess. Father won’t come to find me.’ Hearing her say this he relaxed a bit. He had been tensed, ready to spring on anyone that came around. Lucky for them none of the pack would be out at this hour either. He really didn’t need any of them coming around and scaring the poor girl.

Watching her hand slowly reach out to pet him he lifted his head to meet her hand and half closed his eyes as her hand brushed along his fur. He relaxed a little more but kept his ears and nose alert for any sounds outside the cave. He listened to her talk and thoughts started to form in his mind. He could help her, but how was he going to get her to agree? How was he going to tell her that he knew what happened to her? He couldn’t tell her that he was a werewolf that would just scare her away. He let out a sigh of his own as he continued to think. Somehow, he didn’t know how yet, but somehow he would get her to stay with him. His protective nature had kicked on over her and he would be damned if he allowed anyone to hurt her again. His eyes met hers and he whined slightly at her comment. If only she knew. He may have mostly been free, but someone, something did have a hold over him. It was the reason he had come out here in the forest. Things were tense with the pack and he’d been stressed over it all. His wolf had been dying to get out and run so that’s how he had ended up here. But for now he was ok with that now.

[lilliandoyle]

Thoughts ran through her head regarding the next six months. She couldn’t deal with this vicious cycle anymore. This was her last year in high school and so her focus had to be on her schoolwork and getting into college. She couldn’t be worrying about the abuse at home anymore if she was going to get anywhere this year. Maybe she could talk to the manager to see if she could work more throughout the week, including the hours she worked on the weekend. There was no way, with what she made, that she would be able to move out of the house successfully into an apartment. Apartments were getting more and more expensive. Lillian yawned to herself; her hand scratching behind the wolf’s ear while she tried to find some sort of plan. She had about two thousand dollars saved up but that was for her college fund. There wasn’t a way that she could afford the average monthly rent in Forks, let alone the entire state of Washington. Yawning again, Lillian decided to stop thinking about the depressing matter and postponed to when she was less tired.

It was getting late and the rain didn’t look like it was letting up anytime soon. The only thing she felt was exhaustion at this point. The adrenaline rush she had received before had finally crashed and all she wanted to do was sleep. There was no way that her father would have stayed up to wait for her. If anything, when she got home she would probably get beat up some more or left alone until something else set him off. The wolf felt so warm and comforting and she was so sleepy and dry now that all she wanted to do was sleep next to the wolf. “Hey, Mr. Wolf? Do you mind if I sleep next to you? I promise I don’t snore.”

[MARK HARRIS]

~~~~~~~~~~

Mark couldn't help but watch Lillian carefully. He now knew what was happening to her but he had found out in a way that he could never tell her. He huffed lightly, frustrated at his thoughts. He was going to ask her to move in with him but he had no idea when the right time would come up to ask her. Blue eyes watched her carefully as she scratched behind his ears. She seemed so lost in thought and part of him wished for just a moment that she was a wolf so he could hear her thoughts.

She started yawning then and his eyes darted towards the cave opening. It was still pouring out and didn't look to be letting up anytime soon. His blue eyes darted back to her as she spoke. Of course he didn't mind. He should have, her sleeping on him would not help his feelings any but he didn't want to leave her in the cold. He huffed lightly at her and moved so she would be more comfortable on him. He was only slightly larger than a normal wolf. Not like the shifters of La Push that were near pony sized. He looked at her and nudged her arm lightly with his wet nose, letting her know he’d stay.

[lilliandoyle]

It was getting harder and harder for Lillian to stay awake. She was still kind of wet, but not wet enough for her to develop hypothermia or anything. Usually hypothermia induced the desire to sleep in a person but she didn’t think this was the case. Maybe it was because all of the stress and the crying. Normally when she cried she got really sleepy. That must have been the case. All of the crying made her sleepy. That sounded logical to her in a way. Looking down at the wolf, Lillian nuzzled against its head before getting comfortable. She laid down in a fetal position next to the wolf; her face buried deep into its furry chest. Sighing to herself, she couldn’t help noticing how comfortable she was around this wolf.

As she relaxed against the wolf’s body, her thoughts went to her growing infatuation towards Mark. It was bad that this was the time of her life that she had to fall in like with a guy, especially with all of the “discussions” she had been forced to endure with her father. He didn’t even know about the conversations she had with Mark in the Lodge. A part of her was hoping that he might like her, but she knew that wouldn’t happen especially if he ever found out about what her father did to her on a regular basis. Plus, she was practically a child despite her age. He would never be interested in her. Right? “Mark, I wish you could like me.” Her voice slipped out right before the darkness of sleep claimed her. For the rest of the night, Lillian rested against the wolf and let her mind take her to dreams of her dating Mark; smiling for once about having to do anything with a guy. Maybe her dreams would come true. Time would tell.

(end of thread)