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Post by edwardcullen on Sept 29, 2010 20:01:00 GMT -5
Edward knew about Bella's second thoughts about marrying him. He had no doubt she had doubts now. But he was not showing up at the Swan house for that, that evening. He had to see her if she was safe. He was still worried about Victoria. Even though the Victoria case was put on hold, Edward was still worried about Bella's safety. The wolves were constant in this area. It was just kinda hard for Edward to even get a glimpse of Bella some times. He hated being away from her for a long time. He knew by now she would most likely be asleep This was the only time they really had to share besides school. Which that was not much a plus either. Because they didn't have all their classes together this year.
No worries that Bella would not be asleep at this time of the night. She might be doing some late night home work. Or some thing like watching a game with her dad. Either way, Edward had it all figured out. He could just wait in her bed room until she came to bed. He was always making himself known and she was always getting spooked slightly by his visits. That was not weird to him though.
He just got used to it. Bella was taking a long time before she would come to bed. He even heard Charlie go to bed in the bed room next to him....No Bella....Hmmm....That was strange. She usually texted or called him if she was gonna be late getting home....This was the first time she hadn't....He then saw car lights and saw a vehicle pull up in the drive way. Edward looked at his time on his cell half past one in the morning....He swifts to Bella's bed room window and sees the red truck....It wasn't there a moment a go....Edward then leaped from the window and landed softly on the ground.
"Bella?"
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Post by bella on Oct 5, 2010 16:54:59 GMT -5
The familiar squish of sand fell between Bella’s toes as her footsteps left imprints on the beach towards her truck. A warm sensation fell through her as she smiled at the lingering warmth of Jacob’s embrace around her. She had ditched school and spent the day with him, just hanging out and talking. The two of them were back to the way they were before Italy, talking and laughing until morning’s peak. They had spent most of the day at First Beach, occasionally going back to the Reservation for some food. It wasn’t like Bella to miss school, but she had heard rumors of Edward’s conversing with other people and it wasn’t something she was ready to face. It wasn’t that she didn’t want him to have friends…that wouldn’t be fair. But, did he have to try and be friends with the prettiest girls in school? Why couldn’t he just settle for the nerds, or even the guys? She had caught wind of Cassandra’s guest star appearance at the school, and she felt each and every muscle tense as the name traced through her head. That was the girl Edward had been spotted with…but she didn’t want to think about it. She had just spent an enjoyable night with Jake, and now all she wanted was to settle under the covers of her bed.
The roar of the engine was sure to wake up some of the neighboring families, but Bella didn’t care. She drove out of there quickly though, trying to avoid any conflict that might arise from staying to long. Without Jacob’s presence, she felt her skin grow cold from the autumn night air. Her heater was broken and she began to shiver lightly, praying for the car ride to be over.
It wasn’t too long of a drive back to her home…maybe twenty minutes or so. She quickly cut off the engine when she arrived, not wanting to wake Charlie. From the looks of the dark house, he was sound asleep. Pausing and sighing for a moment, she rested her head against the back of the seat. What was she doing staying out until two in the morning with Jacob? Could her feeling for him really be that strong? Or did she just never want to confront the fact that she might already be losing Edward before she even had a chance? Of course, she probably wasn’t helping the situation. As much as Edward said otherwise, he was jealous of Jacob. And all this time after Italy with the wolf was probably making Edward seem a bit inferior.
A long sigh escaped her lips as she hoped he knew that wasn’t the case. The idea of marriage was just scaring her. Not to mention, the reality of wanting to be turned set in. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to be turned, but she was starting to have second thoughts. Not seeing Charlie, or Renee anymore…giving up her entire life to be frozen in time…never being able to have children…never living. In some aspects, Edward was right…it was a curse…but she couldn’t help but long to be his, and solely his.
Brushing the thought, she finally opened the truck door and got out. The wind immediately blew against her exposed skin and she wrapped her arms around her…trying to stay warm as she moved towards the front door, trying to find her keys. That was when she heard his voice…felt it like a lullaby in the dark. Her heart had of course jumped out of nervousness, but it took her less than a moment to realize who it was. She could feel a knot growing in her stomach and each and every muscle tensing in uncertainty. Finally, she inhaled and turned…instinctively biting her lip. She hesitated at first to make eye contact with him. “Edward…” She breathed, not even having to ask if it was him. She finally let her eyes meet his…unsure of what else to say. Stumbling for words, she asked the first thing that came to her mind. “Is everything alright?” Every inch of her body wanted to be wrapped in his arms, but she knew it wasn’t that simple. It never was. There was a slight tension of awkwardness between them because they had grown a bit apart since the incident in Italy. In silence she waited, her eyes casting away from his to the ground.
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Post by edwardcullen on Oct 5, 2010 20:31:53 GMT -5
Edward saw the way she was acting. Which was not good at all. She was acting nervous and all around him. But it would not be the first time since Italy. He saw her gaze up at him and then his eyes followed hers as they met the ground. Then she had asked him if everything was alright....If everything was alright.....That was the first thing she asks him? There was a time when she could not wait to embrace him....Lately not so much. They have indeed drifted apart. That was clearly seen with the kids at school and even the rest of the Cullen's noticed it. But they kept quiet.
He wanted to hug her right now and just hold her in his arms. But would she let him? Probably not. She did smell like that mutt...He wasn't sure if he wanted to hug her....But he knew where indeed she had been...With Jacob. He was so not liking the amount of time Jacob was getting with Bella now a days. Rather she wanted a hug or not, he decided to grab her into one. He was trying to his best to win her affection back. But the way this was all going, he couldn't see into the future like his sister Alice, but, still he knew.....She wants Jacob. And he would not hold her prisoner if that was what she wanted. But it would tear him apart. She was his very weakness.
"Why wouldn't any thing be alright? Since everything is....I just wanted to wait for you in your bed room. I got here around 11. And you were not here.....But don't even tell me where you were. I know where you were. With him."
Edward looked down at the ground then. There was some thing not right with this situation. And they both knew it. "You remember what I told Jacob that last time we were all together? I'll be by your side til you lure me away. Bella are you doing that now?" He wanted to know. Where her heart truly lies now. He would not be a control freak and not tell her she could not be with who ever she wanted to be with. But deep down in what little life he had left, he wanted her to so much pick him. And say yes to the very question he's asked her once before. And she has not yet said yes....She used to fall asleep in his arms....Now a days, she would fall asleep in Jacob's arms more often.
Maybe Alice's vision was wrong after all....That vision she saw of Bella and Edward running together in the woods, both immortal. Maybe it was just a wish Alice wanted to come true. Cause the way things were going, that was not even going to happen. He didn't want to change her. But now he really wanted to. So that mutt would not bother her. But if he did that here, then she would be hunted by the wolves...And that was some thing that was not gonna take place. Edward would rather die for Bella then that happen to her. He never looked back up at her. And he so didn't need to even read her mind now if he could. She was probably trying to come up with a good enough answer to his question.
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Post by bella on Oct 9, 2010 15:59:16 GMT -5
In a moment’s time, Bella had found herself in Edward’s embrace. Every insecurity, every question seemed to fade away as she rested in his arms. It had been so long since she’d felt him pressed against her and she had missed it. Something was definitely happening to them, and she hated to watch it without knowing what to do. She wanted him…she had always loved him. But, since his disappearance, she was distrusting of what was going to happen. She had kept her distance to protect herself, but in his arms, she now began to regret that decision. She had heard the rumors of his mingling at school, and a jealous shiver tingled down her spine. Now she knew how he felt…but even so, she hadn’t been the one to walk away and tear his heart out. He had done that to her, and she had suffered numerous months screaming in nightmares…trying to find peace. And that one glimpse of hope and serenity was found in Jacob. How could she let that fade? How could she trust him?
His words filled her ears and she buried herself deeper into his chest. She was ashamed to have been spending so much time with Jacob, but she couldn’t help it. He provided that warmth that Edward had been lacking. Instead of being at her house every night like he used to, he only came once in a while…making sure she was okay. Countless nights were spent lying alone in vacant covers and she hated it. Jacob had seen the chance, and stepped in…inviting her over for a warm campfire or a night’s walk on the beach. It gave Bella that closure that everything would be alright.
After a small silence filled the air, Edward continued…asking if she was trying to push him away. She knew part of it was rhetorical, but…something in her provoked her to answer. “No, Edward…I’m not. I just…” Her voice trailed off, the words escaping her for the moment. She could feel her muscles tensing under her light clothes and she trembled lightly from the cold of the night. “I needed some time…I needed to clear my head…” She pulled back a bit to look up at him. “You left…without a warning’s notice…and now you’re back…asking me to marry you? Am I just supposed to act like nothing’s happened…?” It was that familiar frustrated voice, and she turned to gaze downward. “I love you, Edward…but I’m not completely healed...” Her arms wrapped around herself and she closed her eyes, wanting nothing more than to just curl up with him for one night like they used to. There was no need to mention Jake. He already knew that he was helping with the healing. But, at the same time, they were becoming closer and Bella was starting to second guess the whole vampire scene. Sure, she loved all the Cullens and wanted to remain family with them, but was she really willing to give up mortality? Was she willing to become a monster and take innocent lives in her newborn years? She didn’t know…and right now she didn’t want to think about it. It had been plaguing her mind for the past few month’s nonstop and she was tired of it. All she wanted was to spend some time with Edward.
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Post by edwardcullen on Oct 11, 2010 0:19:21 GMT -5
He looked at her straight and forward when she retrieved his embrace he had on her.....
“No, Edward…I’m not. I just…” “I needed some time…I needed to clear my head…” “You left…without a warning’s notice…and now you’re back…asking me to marry you? Am I just supposed to act like nothing’s happened…?” “I love you, Edward…but I’m not completely healed...”
This was his fault. If he had not been so selfish and left her alone here. For so long, then none of this would have happened.Her love for him would be a lot stronger right now to. But he could plainly see that she was not healed from the pain he gave her before Italy.
"It was my fault to leave you alone. You are not suppose to act like nothing has happened either. I don't expect you to give me a yes or no answer right away about my proposal....You do need time with that. I respect that. But, also respect that I need time before I give my answer to rather or not to change you....Which I can see that you are having second thoughts about....Bella, I'm not going to push you in to becoming immortal....You know I've never done that....And if you change your mind about that too....I'll respect that...I don't want you to end your life for me...."
He saw the way she wrapped her arms around her body. She wanted that touch....That feeling he used to give her...When there was nothing in this damned world but them....He walked closer to her....As he placed his fingers on her chin.....And looked at her eyes that were still closed....
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~SCENE BREAK~
He laid on one side of the bed with her on the other....His arm draped over her shoulders....This is what he missed the most....Being in her arms....And just laying with her....She was so warm....He missed that so much. The way she would lay her head on his chest...Just like she knew she had nothing to worry about. It was very quiet and calm in her bed room that night. Just as it always would be....Edward knew her father was already asleep. They had that less to worry about. He didn't know what she was up to these days. All he knew was that she was spending more time with Jacob then him. He could understand why she had probably fallen in love with Jacob....Jacob could give her so much ore than he could. She would not have to worry about leaving her family for no reason at all....She would be able to have children....Where as vampires could not conceive....That bothered Edward a lot. He was so worried that that would be a main reason she would go for Jacob instead of him....All these thoughts raced in his head as he laid there with her in silence....He brushed her hair off her cheek just then and sighed....His eyes were so relaxed as he watched over her. Grabbing her fingers to where they intertwined with his own as he continued to hold on to them and let her hug him....
"Bella....I can't give you everything...." He spoke quietly...But loud enough for her to hear him....As he laid there beside her....He was a little upset still about that....He would not be able to give her a child....But he so desperately wanted everything as it was before he left....But that was not going to happen....He screwed up just once....And that was some thing he was going to have to live with for the rest of his soulless life..... |
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Post by bella on Oct 15, 2010 0:30:34 GMT -5
His words reached her ears in a harmony she had missed. He wasn’t upset with her, he wasn’t angry with her…he understood. A tight knot fell in her stomach at the thought and immediately she felt the guilt begin to eat away at her conscious. She loved Edward…more than anything in this world, but she was broken beyond repair. As much as she wanted to, she would never run quite right again. He closed the space between them and she felt his cool fingers brush against her chin gently. Her body then pressed into his, a spark of their old passion taking hold.
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Even with his skin ice cold, she felt warm in his arms. Everything felt right when they were like this…just the two of them. Nothing else in the world mattered. Her arm was draped over his chest, her fingers lightly stroking at his side. This was how they used to be…perfect in each others arms. For just one night, everything finally felt normal again. No weird tensions…no awkward moments of hesitation. Bella was in her love’s arms, and she knew it. She had always known it, but something had caused her doubt. Maybe it was Jacob’s security in Edward’s absence. She didn’t know, but she honestly didn’t care. They were finally together again. That was all that mattered.
Her eyes were closed as she relaxed under his touch. Their bodies were pressed against one another and she was sure he could feel her heartbeat. She could feel it herself, along with the blood running warm through her veins. In his presence, her heart always faltered in its normal beating…speeding up at even the thought of his touch. It was amazing to Bella how they could just lay there in silence and be perfectly content. There was no awkwardness, no need to even speak. They both knew what the other was feeling.
His words finally broke the silence, but Bella remained still next to him. She knew he couldn’t give her everything she wanted, but there were always ways around it. And even if there wasn’t, she was perfect content just living with him by her side. That was all she needed. “You don’t have to…I have everything I want right here…” She whispered, her eyes finally opening and looking up at him. A warm, loving smile was on her lips and her passion and desire for him was apparent in her eyes. Moving closer to him, she rested her head against his and closed her eyes again, breathing in his heavenly scent. She had missed him, and she was glad he was finally beside her again. “I love you, Edward…”
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Post by edwardcullen on Oct 15, 2010 1:29:34 GMT -5
“You don’t have to…I have everything I want right here…” She still got to every time. Her blood was so hard to just ignore. He knew it was wrong to think...But being a vampire you just couldn't help yourself...He knew what her blood tasted like already...But it still got to him every time she was this close to him...Feeling her heart beat in her chest made him slightly jealous too....Thankfully he has learned how to control himself a lot better. If not for Carlisle being there beside him when Bella was dying, then she would be dead right now, not here....That night still bothered him some...But he just let it slide...
“I love you, Edward…”
What to say now? "Just tell her that too...She doesn't know what is really going on...Tell her now...." He thought. But he was scared to tell her he loved her...Bella knew it was hard for him to express himself...But he was even a better liar now than he was when he first met Bella. "I love you too..." He replies back...Thankful that she was not looking directly at him when he said that. He hated this. Being a liar! He loved Brooke...Not Bella. This was not a good place for him to be. He just held her hand like he always did....And let her lay there for a few minutes. He closed his eyes the minute she trailed her fingers down his side....And breathed out a heavy breath...Even though it was fake...He knew she knew that he couldn't breathe. But he was trying to make it to where she knew he was satisfied with what she was doing some way....
"Bella...." She finally moved around and looked up at him...As he sat there looking her in the eyes as she gave him a loving smile..."Please....Just stop...You are my weakness...." He said in his mind again....But he lost himself for a second and kissed her...Passionately...He just couldn't help himself...What the hell?! "Stop! Edward you are an idiot! Just stop!!" But he couldn't as his hands slid down her tiny waist....And pulled her closer to him then....He knew she would so not mind about this...But it was his fault for even doing this....It was gonna end nasty he knew it would now...But he just lost himself tonight with her...As he continued to rub his hands all over her perfect body. Some thing was coming back out to him....Some thing he had not felt in a long time...Warmth...Of a woman...Bella was indeed that...
He placed her on her bed as he was on top of her...And leaned down and kissed her neck..."Allow this night to only be between us...." He said as he broke away from the kiss for a minute. This was so dangerous....He realized now what he was doing. He was the same person he made the deal to be away from....Yes that had finally donged in his mind....But he couldn't help himself...As he lowered his head and kissed her neck gently....He knew too that she would not say a word to any one about this night. Not even her mother.....Edward just wanted this one more night to be a special night for her....He was not even considering this was her last night with him and that this was going to be harder on her later..... |
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Post by bella on Oct 16, 2010 13:32:35 GMT -5
His words came out slow and thoughtful and Bella thought nothing of the hidden lies behind them. She knew it in the air, in their kisses, that they both finally felt the perfect way with each other. It didn’t matter that Bella had been hanging around Jake and it didn’t matter the rumors she had heard at school. Tonight was how it used to be…how it needed to be. The two of them, completely lost in each other’s love. This was how the story was supposed to end…Alice had seen it in Volterra. They were destined to be together…and finally in the cool air of the night, Bella felt that love…that passion that they had before he left. Nothing else mattered but them.
He whispered her name, and a familiar feeling of butterflies fluttered in her stomach, her heart racing...her skin growing warm to the touch. Moments after, she felt his kiss…and sparks flew through her mind. It was sincere, passionate, and intense. It made her crave more, her hands moving to the sensitive skin on his neck…pulling him closer to her. His hands moved down her waist and she exhaled slowly, trying to keep some source of control on the situation. But as he moved on top of her…his cool kisses gracing her neck, a soft moan finally escaped her throat. There was a mix of adrenaline and endorphins coursing through her veins. The simple fact that a vampires lips were at her neck, caused a dark sensation…the desire to be like him growing with every passing moment.
Her hands moved from his neck to his hands, gently gripping a small bit to show she enjoyed what he was doing. His last words ran through her head, and she couldn’t help but smile. Her eyes closed as his cool kisses continued on her warm skin…her neck arching to the side to allow him more access. Her touch continued down, clawing gently down his skin. She knew she wouldn’t hurt him, but she wasn’t in the mood for rough…she wanted passion. Her cheeks burned a light crimson as she felt herself growing aroused by his touch. This had been her condition to marry him, but he had refused her once before. Would he do the same now? From their apparent excitement, she hoped not. After all, he had started it this time…
Finding herself lost in the moment, her hands moved to the back of his shirt and she pulled it off, letting it fall to the floor in a growing pile of clothing. Her lips then found their way back to his, kissing him lovingly, as her hands demanded his body closer to hers…
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Post by edwardcullen on Oct 16, 2010 19:50:32 GMT -5
If he had a heart it would be beating as fast as hers. He could hear her thumping at a very fast rate even deep inside her body...He felt a colder chill on his back as his shirt came off by her own hands....But he smiled none the less. As he continued to kiss her. He too started to take off her blouse...As he pulled it up and over her head and threw it on the floor in the same pile as where his shirt had laid.
He couldn't help but moan out lowly as she rubbed her nails down his back...He felt her arch her neck so he had more room. But even then he knew what she was saying...And that answer was still no from him....But he was able to control himself now with her. As he kissed her all over her neck area....He could feel her body tremble every so lightly. Must've been because of his cold skin hitting hers. But she seemed to not mind it at all.
"If this is what you want....Then, I will give it to you...." He whispered in her ear ever so lightly....As he was being gentle with her as well. He had to be careful with her and not scratch her any where....She was still human. What he meant by saying what he had, is that he was ready for her if she was. If only this was all true....But it was nothing but a mere attempt to give her that last good love affair before he bid her fare well. He knew she would most likely say yes to what he said....It seemed to be as it always had been when they first met....
A vampire and human so drawn to each other that it did seem like a fairy tale. But this was real....Even though he showed not signs of the fairy tale vampire you read about in books and all, he was one. And she was pure human all the way. A very precious creature in the clutches of a vampire. He has her where he wants her as well...What was keeping him from killing her? His love for her for one and the fact that he did not prey on humans was another....But even in the very back of his mind, he wanted to kill her....But he couldn't. If he had so much bit her, he knew his life was over. He shook that thought out of his mind as he let her lips hit his once again and he kissed her very passionately....With his own fingers finding her jeans' button....He didn't want to stop. He wanted this for her. Because he knew she wanted this more than any thing....."Just stop me if you feel scared...." Which is what she should be feeling....
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Post by bella on Oct 16, 2010 21:48:34 GMT -5
Even though his hands were icy cold, his touch burned against her skin. She loved every moment of it, and her body craved more. It was amazing how passion alone could spark such arousal between two people. But Bella loved it…she had dreamt of this night many times and she thought for sure this was just another dream. His touch pleaded otherwise. As much as she hated that he wouldn’t turn her, the fact that his lips were still on her neck made her blood run hot. Every touch…every breath…every kiss. It all just seemed too perfect to be true. Her hands moved from his back to his chest…lightly tracing up the outline of his muscles. He was perfect…she didn’t deserve him. He deserved someone who was as perfect as him, and clumsy, emotional Bella wasn’t it. Her mind pleaded with her to stop before she regretted something, but her body begged for his touch.
Her kiss broke for just a moment as her blouse fell to the floor before she pressed her lips back against his, kissing him with new desires. There was no doubt in her mind that he knew what he was doing; she only wished she could say the same. It wasn’t like she was completely clueless, but she couldn’t help but feel a bit self conscious in front of him. Pulling away from the kiss for a moment, she looked up at him. Catching his eyes, she smiled nervously up at him. His hands worked at the button of her jeans and then to the zipper and she managed to snug out of them…kicking them to the floor. She was in her black bra and matching boy-short panties. This was the first time Edward had ever seen her this exposed and she was afraid he’d be repulsed. Even if she wasn’t ugly by any means…she still felt inferior to the type of girls he was used to…Alice…Rosalie…Esme…they were all so beautiful and perfect.
Forcing the thought from her mind, she leaned up and kissed him once more, pulling his body close to hers as her hands danced over his jeans…pressing against him lightly. He was just as aroused as she was, and she grinned into the kiss, rubbing him gently. She then moved her hand to the button of his jeans and undid it slowly. She was a little hesitant to go any further, but her body ached for him…desired to be one with him. Her hands toyed with the zipper, finally pulling it down, but she didn’t pull them off. Leaning back down against the pillow of her bed, her eyes met his for a moment before traveling down his body. Her breathing was rigid, and her chest already rose and fell rapidly. “I want you, Edward…” She whispered a small smile on her lips as her hand moved below his jeans as she teased him lightly. Beneath him, her body writhed in desire, pleading for his touch. It was unbearable and she felt herself begin to tremble…her mind clouded by pure bliss. Tonight was their night…tonight she would finally be with the man she loved…
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Post by edwardcullen on Oct 16, 2010 22:41:00 GMT -5
“I want you, Edward…” He knew she would say some thing like that. How could she deny what he wanted? What they both want...He knew she was new to this...So he would be easy on her. He felt his zipper go down. As he eased out of his pants....And looked at her the minute he saw her bare skin...He then saw the look in her eye. She was insecure about some thing....
"What?" He smiled sweetly at her as he asked as he stopped suddenly wondering what was wrong. She was beautiful to him. Is that what was bothering her? He trailed his two fingers down her chest...Maybe that would help her be secured about herself....She was perfect to him. He never told her that. He never had to. He though she just knew he thought that. Then again she was not a mind reader like he was. She would tell him that from time to time too...
But soon she was back to kissing him...Even then her touch was so amazing...He couldn't lie about that. She might not be knowledged in this.....But she knew how to turn him on..
This was not a good place for this....But where else could they go? He couldn't take her to a motel....That would not be right to him....Even with Brooke that was not in a motel....But still, he thought the whole motel scene was a bit slutty....And the last two women he has been with like this was far from that. Even though Brooke constantly ranted on being one....He saw nothing like that in his fiance's eyes....Brooke was perfect to him....So what was he doing here with Bella? He told Brooke he would end his relationship with Bella some how...He didn't tell her how....If this is what it takes....He knew this is all it would take. Bella was giving up some thing to him that he even knew all women were scared to just give up to just any one....Their virginity....But, when Bella said that she wanted him, that was enough to tell him that she was ready to loose it....
He didn't want her to be chilled by his skin...But what could he do? If he covered her with a blanket that would beat the purpose as to what they were trying to accomplish....He continued to give her a passionate kiss as he then started to slowly remove her panties....If he had a heart it would so be off the charts with its beats by now....The thought of her father coming in at this very moment scared Edward almost half to death....But at least they were being quiet with this...As he pulls off her panties all the way....And lowered his head to give her, her first kiss some where else.....
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